Thursday, May 14, 2009

Why I Voted Democrat

I voted Democrat because
I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want.
I've decided to marry my garden gnome.

I voted Democrat because
I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn't.

I voted Democrat because
I believe the government will do a better job of
Spending the money I earn than I would.

I voted Democrat because
Freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

I voted Democrat because
When we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they are doing because they now think we are good people.

I voted Democrat because
I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves who all have guns.

I voted Democrat because
I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.

I voted Democrat because
I'm not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

I voted Democrat because
I think illegal aliens and people that are able bodied enough to have a job have a right to free health care, Education, and Social Security benefits.

I voted Democrat because
I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the democrats see fit.

I voted Democrat because
I believe liberal judges need to rewrite The Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters or Congress.

I voted Democrat because
My head is so firmly planted up my butt that it is unlikely that I'll ever have another point of view or intelligent, logic supported thought.

(Not original with me, but sobering... Larry G.)

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